I remember being riddled with anxiety with the thought of solo-parenting my nine-month-old’s first-ever flight. As a new mom, there was so much I didn’t know. It was only a three-hour trip, but I couldn’t tune out the fear of struggling with an inconsolable baby while surrounded by gawking strangers. I was also confronting some deep discomfort about breastfeeding in public (who really wants to be in elbow-touching-distance with a stranger while nursing?). Cue excessive hormonal sweats.

But here’s the thing mama. I did the damn thing. And so will you. 

In honor of paying it forward—because motherhood is HARD—these are the game-changing decisions and products that have made flying solo with my baby manageable (and dare I say, even enjoyable). 

Plan Your Pre-flight Logistics  

If you can, book your travel around your child’s nap schedule (this helped my daughter sleep for two-thirds of her first flight). The decision to purchase a seat for your little one or carry them as a lap infant depends on three factors: Does your baby need to be on you 100% of the time for comfort? Do you want a break during your flight? Can you afford the extra expense? 

While I completely understand being price conscientious, I weighed safety, flexibility, privacy for nursing, and overall peace of mind as well worth the added cost. I used a combination of my Solly wrap baby carrier for nursing during takeoff and landing and my Uppababy Mesa Max car seat for naps. The upgraded leg room was absolutely necessary if you plan on rocking or transitioning your baby to their car seat.

Be sure to verify your car seat is FAA-compliant (most car seats will have a sticker on the bottom with the label or you can verify in your instruction manual—keep in mind not all car seat bases can fly). If you choose to purchase a seat for your child, they will need to occupy a window seat. 

Pack Essentials for Ease and Function

Make a packing checklist—and save it. You will refer to this again, and again. Now that my daughter and I have our wings (ask for this keepsake if it’s your first flight) and are avid travelers, we’ve been able to trim our list in half. These are the baby essentials I strongly suggest you add to your list if you want to save time and frustration. 

• Child’s birth certificate
• Uppababy Mesa Max car seat (infant) / Nuna Rava Car seat (toddler) 
• Britax car seat travel cart (This was my favorite hack for a heavy car seat while carrying multiple bags.) 
• Skip Hop diaper bag (If you don’t want to rifle through your diaper bag, my ultimate hack is to use a fanny pack loaded with the bare essentials. This saved me so much time and hassle and made bathroom trips so efficient). 
• Frida Baby portable white noise machine
• Amacool battery-operated stroller fan 
• Solly wrap baby carrier 
• We Are Amma breastfeeding cover
• Milk travel bag with ice pack 
• Dry snacks and/or milk
• New toy and/or teether
• Earth Mama organic diaper balm (I lather my baby’s bottom before the flight so we can avoid diaper changes until we arrive at our destination, saving extra trips and hassle.)
• Sanitizing wipes
• Purell

Prepare for Security Screenings and Flying

After some trial and error with TSA, the most hassle-free option, if you are breastfeeding, is to nurse. If that’s not an option, bringing frozen milk in clear packaging is easiest for screening; otherwise, fresh milk and/or formula will need to be tested by a TSA agent with a strip above the open bottle. This last screening process caused me a near panic attack seeing multiple hands with germ-covered gloves handle my breastmilk, which was not always visible. It’s within your right to ask a TSA agent to change their gloves, but they can decline. This process, including a pat down, took an extra 20-30 minutes. 

Once you’ve boarded, before you waste time fumbling around trying to figure out how to secure your car seat, simply ask your flight attendant for a seatbelt extender, which can go right over your car seat. Also, be sure to nurse or bottle feed your little one starting at least 15 minutes before takeoff and landing to relieve the pressure in their ears. 

Now, breathe. You’ve got this, mama. Wishing you smooth travels.  

Originally appeared in Golden Gate Mothers Group Magazine.